Guest Post- Hubby Style

Jules Here-

Actually, it's not me-- I am just a vessel for my awesome brother-in-law, Brian, to post his *first* post on our blog:

Hello all:


Brian here, one of the many loyal followers of this blog.  The past few months I have been kidding my wife about the noticeable decline in blog posts.  I join Em in saluting Jules in her efforts of posting despite facing quite a daunting schedule the past few months herself.  So rather than complain to Ems and Jules I decided to put pen to paper and contribute to the cause.  As I have often told people, you don't have the right to complain about a problem if you haven't contributed to a solution.  The tempting path of least resistance beckons but for once I will turn a deaf ear to its siren's call.   Perhaps after reading such pedestrian fare, you dear fans will take arms and exhort our two intrepid ladies to once again take to the keyboards to spare you all having to experience the dreaded "guest blogger entry" phenomena.  It is quite late here and I am not really looking forward to grading another clinical log so this is my excuse to procrastinate...

Theo & Gemma

We just welcomed Gemma home a few weeks ago.  Amidst the hustle and bustle of adjustment, we have sprinkled in a visit to the ER, a couple of pediatrician visits on account of a virus that the younger cohort are passing around, hosted a joint birthday party for Nate and Theo (12 and 11 respectively), started conditioning for the Select Soccer players (Nate, Theo, and Matt) and in  few weeks, add Tad to that soccer schedule as he makes his debut this spring season with the U6 division.  Over the years I have invariably been asked, "how do you guys do it?" (pitch and intonation increasing with each additional child).  I suppose being in the middle of this maelstrom I have been made immune to the time demands, as with everything else in life, you just get used to the pace that is set and eventually adjust to it.  Em has alluded as much in past posts about our tag-team approach to parenting.  We have abandoned the man to man defense and went zone when we brought Matt home, effectively outnumbering us 3-2 back in the waning summer months of 2005.  (Just thought I would add a basketball reference there with March Madness lurking in the corner, which is incidentally a national holiday in our house).  But really it should come as no surprise to those who know her, that a main reason this work for us, is because she is an amazing woman.  My better half will celebrate a birthday in a few days.  Each passing year celebrated gives us opportunity to reflect, gain perspective, and hopefully grow in a little wisdom from the experience.  We have been together 18 wonderful years with 12 of those as parents.  So without further ado, I give you my top ten reasons as to why our family of 10 hums like the well-oiled machine it does.

Baby Gemma in Daddy's Arms

10. Organized - no brainer here.  Virtually impossible to have a functional household if there is no semblance of order in place.  From daily requirements of educating 2 sixth graders, 2 third graders, and 1 in kindergarten, to maintaining the house and keeping them all fed and watered, Em has the entire process regimented.  The structure is not so inflexible that it does not allow for adjustments on the fly.  The existing framework though is established and allows her to build her day around it.


9.  Practical - Em has taught me the truth behind the words "just because you can, doesn't mean you should".  No fluff, no unnecessary frills, focus on the need and go from there.  Don't mistake it for a Spartan lifestyle as these kids don't lack for anything.  But by focusing and prioritizing on what is clearly valuable and necessary versus what could be trivial has taught our kids (and myself) to differentiate between "need" and "want".  Not saying we don't struggle and blur the lines but hopefully this will plant a seed to negate the overpowering sense of immediate self gratification that is prevalent in today's society.


8. Wise in finances - Again very little explanation needed here.  Em makes sure we get maximum value for our money.  Teaches us how to be responsible stewards of God's  blessings.  I don't make LeBron money so every little thing must be accounted for responsibly.  There is a funny Simpson's gag where Homer bemoans his lack of money "OH!  I have 3 kids and no money, why can't I have no kids and 3 money?"  Thanks to Ems, we won't have to cross that road.


7. Keen sense of humor - Ems keeps the household mood light with a well placed quip or pun.  It is this same sense of humor that allows her to also gain perspective on situations.  Laughter is good medicine for the soul.  A delicate balance must be struck to have a well rounded child.  You don't want them to take themselves so seriously that they become paralyzed and become afraid to make mistakes.  Let them know it is ok to make mistakes and to laugh about it.  I think a child becomes better equipped to adjust to life's demands when they can laugh about things and/or their foibles and mistakes.


6. Patient and kind - Don't mistake this for lack of discipline as she imparts that as well.  It is more in the application of that same discipline.  In the setting of boundaries and expectations, the way the discipline is imparted goes a long way in how effective it takes root.  We must always guard against disciplining out of anger.  Em again strikes that difficult balance and metes out the discipline albeit out of kindness and patience.  Again, not saying we're batting 1.000 here but the approach is in place and gives us the proper mindset and approach.

Jojo & Gemma

5. Intelligent - I always tell the kids that they have the utter bad luck of having a smart mom.  There won't be much that they get past her or a trick turned that she won't catch.  Will this make for a fun filled teen years when all they seem to want to do is see what they can get away with?  Absolutely!  But give me Em any day of the week and twice on Sunday and let the games begin!!

Smart AND beautiful Ems- She's going to kill us for posting this :)

4. Ethical - Em has a strong set of ethics, a high standard of honest and honorable dealings with others.  Her ethics are based on her morals which are well formed and a strong correlation can be drawn between how ethical you are to how morally sound you are.



3. Moral - One of Em's strengths which I admire is her outstanding moral fiber and backbone.  These morals drive the personal philosophies that gives us the ability to know right from wrong.



2. Character and Integrity - Em's aggregate features and traits are formed by integrity, allowing her to discern right and wrong and act properly on that discernment regardless of cost and consequence.  Emily has always been unashamed of doing what is right and what a powerful witness to our children during their formative years as they are constantly bombarded by the agendas of secular culture which run in diametric opposition to Christian formation.


1. Seeks God in all things - All these traits would be good by themselves, but they are made intrinsically good by God's grace.  What good is your moral compass if it is calibrated by a subjective standard, capricious, and prone to change?  Em has ordered her life to the true North that is God's will.  There's no getting lost there.

Mother Mary & Jesus

Over the years, I have come to understand that as parents, we are called to be faithful and to be consistent.  Mother Teresa exhorts, "God has not called me to be successful.  He called me to be faithful."  So as parents we strive to be faithful to ourselves, to each other, to the teachings of Christ.  Through it all we must find consistency with God's will for it is in finding that consistency that we are made holy in our walk with Him.  Years of perspective and grace has revealed that character development, not comfort is of lasting importance during our time in this temporal plane.  Becoming like Christ does not mean losing your personality or becoming a mindless clone reduced to following a set rule of law.  God created you and revels in your uniqueness, so He certainly does not want to destroy it.  Being Christ-like is about transforming your character not your personality.


I love all my kids, one of the most fulfilling moments I share with them is when I get a peek at the characteristics that make them each unique in their own way.  I can summarily and magnanimously say that they have all my wife's good traits and none of my bad.  How is this possible?  Let's just say that there is a certain grandmother who undoubtedly storms the heavens daily in humble supplication and prayer asking that her grandkids not turn into the one hellion she raised.  I may be the head of this household but there is no doubting as to who is the backbone.  Happy Birthday Em!  I count myself truly blessed to share a life together.



Easy rule #98758 - Make your life easy, find a good wife or find a saintly person to intercede on your behalf that you be blessed with one.


Easy rule #78987 - Em is not really perfect, she has terrible taste in movies as evidenced by the random offerings that mysteriously pop up on my Recently Watched Netflix queue.

One More Blessing to Rejoice In

Jules here-

We have an official announcement: Gemma Bernadette joined Em's brood one week ago today! She weighed in at a whopping 7#10oz (Em's biggest baby) and was the fastest delivery yet! CONGRATULATIONS!! (To me too, as I am an Aunt again :))  

Simona & Gemma

Once again, I have braced myself for the shock of people saying, "EIGHT children?!!? How can she afford it? She must have a huge house!" Or even, "What is she thinking?!?"  

 

Cousin fun! Three year old trouble makers....

Though I just missed the birth of precious Gemma to drive back to NH, I did have the opportunity to spend a few days with her LARGE family and I gleaned some precious insight into her lifestyle:

• Having a Large Family Makes You Forget About Ridiculous Standards- Ems doesn't have time to worry about finding all the letters in the Cheez-It Scrabble crackers to make a Pinterest-worthy lunch. She just feeds the kids.  She doesn't try to throw themed birthday parties- she simply makes their favorite foods and a simple cake on their special day.

Yes, I am a true word nerd.

• Large Families Entertain Themselves- No play dates? Who cares. No friends at the playground for pick-up soccer? You have enough for a team.  Ems doesn't have to come up with activities, games, or crafts- the kids are incredibly good at finding things to do.  Her kids made my kids look whiny, dramatic, and unimaginative...

Reading Curious George

The girls!

Blurry as they are rocking...

• Children Learn Empathy- Older children see how to care for younger ones; they are able to learn precious life skills.  Theo was incredibly patient with the ever-pestering Lissie (who ADORES him) and he was able to chuckle at her playful persistence.  Each love to hold the new baby, and most of the time they are big helpers to Em!

Theo with the sleeping Gemma!

• Babies Are Tiring No Matter How Many Children you Have- Newborns are precious- but also exhausting.  No matter how many kids you have, newborns make boot camp look like kindergarten.  One thing that IS a challenge with a large family, is initially finding the energy to cope with feeding, clothing, and schooling the rest of the family during this crazy time. Luckily, she has a great community helping with meals, transportation to sports, and an awesome husband who makes delicious grilled dinners and can shower seven kids in less than 15 minutes…

  

  Sleepover girls after showering!

• Nobody Regrets Having Children- Only NOT Having Them- I work with the elderly; I can't even TELL you how many patients have said something like, "I had 4 children, but I wish I had more! I thought I couldn't afford them- I was wrong!"  Nowadays we say things like, "Oh I had my boy- now I am done!" or "I can't handle any more after two!"  Ems is embracing every gift from God- and she will NEVER live with the elderly guilt of not being open to life.  Each child brings a special joy, love and happiness to her family!!

One more blessing to add for next year's photo! Congrats!!!!

Easy Rule #353- Who’s going to take care of you when get older? Have a back-up plan. Or eight back-up-plans.

Easy Rule #9808- Raising children IS what life is about. Though it can be trying at times, try to remember that they grow quickly!!

Mini Rant #3- Knowing what's best

Jules here-

Though my life has become a bit scattered between packing, finding a new home, and working two jobs, I had the chance to attend the annual Homeschooling Mass in Manchester, NH last week.  New Hampshire has the highest percentage of homeschoolers in the country; however, most choose homeschooling for libertarian reasons rather than spiritual (i.e. Live Free or Die mentality).  Though I do not use a Catholic curriculum, I love to surround myself with people who have a similar belief system as I do. 

 

In a cathedral, one is often in awe of the grandiosity, the holiness, and the sense that the very building is in steeped tradition.  As the people all filed into the wooden pews, I gaped at the size of many of the families. With my family of three children, I was by far a minority!  Ems would have fit in perfectly with her brood; plus James's noises were easily drowned out by the steady fussing of several babies throughout the church.

When I mention to people that Ems is expecting her *gasp* 8th child, many people balk at the idea and some even have the audacity to say, "Well, as long as the oldest ones aren't raising the younger ones."  I often start sputtering excuses such as, "Of course not! Ems takes care of all of them."

But, sitting at the Mass, I had the opportunity to observe a family of six children interact: 1 fifteen year-old boy, twin 13 year-old boys, 1 five year-old boy, 1 three year-old boy, and one 2 week-old baby girl.  I didn't even notice the tiny infant in the eldest boy's arms until after the readings, as he snuggled her so gently.  The mother helped keep the younger two boys quiet and seated (like wrestling wild monkeys) while the eldest boys kept watch over their new baby sister.  When the baby fussed, the mother took her for a moment, soothed her, and then her son asked to hold her for the remainder of Mass.  Even the twin 13 year-olds were able to regulate the toddlers and keep them focused during the sermon. 

Was that older boy caring for his sibling? Yes! Did he look happy doing it? Yes!  What is so wrong with giving older children responsibility? Do you not want to teach your son's to be caring fathers? Or your daughter's how to nurture and protect their younger siblings?  Am I saying that older siblings should change every diaper, wake up for nighttime feedings, bathe all the younger kids while the mother sits and reads a book? No (as idyllic as that sounds...)  Children should have a balance of play, school, and housework, which can include helping with the younger set.  Schools often neglect teaching those valuable life skills and parent's often shun real responsibility for their kids.

Which is healthier for a kid: being overscheduled with sports, camps, lessons, etc so they have no free time? OR having their free time sometimes include playing with a younger sibling, or babysitting while mom cooks dinner?

My grandmother lost her mother when she was very young, and her father pretty much left the chores, raising the children, and cooking up to her-- she was even forced to throw out her books as she no longer had 'time' for them....   Am I advocating enslaving the older siblings? Of course not.  But don't throw out the baby with the bathwater-- look for the positive aspects of having older children involved in caregiving of the younger kids.  

Grace has become incredibly empathetic, kind, and trustworthy since I began entrusting her with "keep an eye on the little ones outside!" She reports any wrongdoings, runs to tell me emergencies, and tries to dissuade bad decisions (i.e. a 4 year-old climbing 40' in a tree...)  I don't have Grace change diapers, but she does run upstairs to get wipes or clothing for me.  I only can hope that Lissie and James will be as helpful someday....

Easy Rule #2498- Don't always assume that responsibility is a bad thing, it can create the very virtues you want to instill in your children.

Easy Rule #434- Mind what you say to people about their families-- you can't always assume you know what's best for someone else.

Hurry Up and Eat

Ems here:

Let's start with a large family funny comment of the week:

This one comes from the dental office, which is charmingly in walking distance from my home.  I took all the kids in last week for cleanings--5 out of 7 being old enough, and the other smaller two came along simply to make the trip more fun for me. Right away the kids make a beeline for the corner reading table and grab piles of books to read, scooching into the child-size wooden chairs or sharing the larger, adult chairs in the main area of the waiting room.  I sign them in, go take a seat myself, and we have only a minute wait before "Nate!" was called back by the super-charged friendly hygienist.  There is only one other person in the room, an older woman, who wore the typical expression of awed bemusement I am quite familiar with in folks observing my herd of little humans for the first time.  She didn't say anything as I read a couple books on tooth hygiene to Gabe and convinced Simona that the floor mat in front of the office door was not an appropriate place to lay spread-eagled.  After a couple more "mommy" interventions, it was like the light turned on in the woman's head:  "Oh!! You're their MOTHER!," she burst out suddenly.  I replied, a smiling, drawn out, "Yeees?" And she quickly explained, "I thought you were a daycare provider taking all the kids out for cleanings!"

Is that a usual daycare service? Who knew?  Well, my daycare obviously specializes in half-Asian children.

Anyway, sad news. Get ready.

Aldi is closed for the month because of renovations!!!

Oh, Lord, how will we eat?! There's only Kroger, WalMart, and Riesbecks nearby...!

Ok, we will be fine. But I am in sticker shock over the price of groceries in other stores. Aldi has truly spoiled me--the simplicity of the small store size and limited selections really helps me streamline my shopping experience. I literally spent 90 minutes roaming through the vast array that was Kroger, completely overwhelmed by the volume of choice, and ended up with a very random assortment of items in my cart. At least one of them was A&W cream soda.

What I didn't get was meat. Beef, even ground beef, was SO overpriced I literally couldn't put it in the cart because I was so aggravated, despite the fact that we have depleted most of the freezer. I'm holding out till May 22nd, and then I'm going back to Aldi, baby!  In the meantime, we will be eating more chicken and pasta and whatever other motley meals present themselves from my pantry scrounging and ineffective shopping.

I thought I would share two meals that are ideal for those times when variety is limited and time is of the essence (such as soccer season or any other time when dinner has to be on the table by 4 and finished by 4:30 and your kids won't be home till 9).

Biscuits with Turkey Gravy 

First off, I made two pans (9 inch rounds) of biscuits, courtesy of the Bisquick recipe on the box mix. If you don't want to do even this much, simply crack open a can of Hungry Jack's or whatever insta-biscuit is your favorite.

1. While the biscuits were cooking, I opened 1 lb of ground turkey and browned it, seasoning liberally with salt, pepper, thyme, celery seed (add whatever seasoning you like).

2. To the browned turkey, add 1 can of cream of mushroom soup, some milk, and a couple tablespoons of flour, and a chicken bouillon cube until you get the quantity and consistency of gravy that you like.

2. Ladle over biscuits and serve with beans and a smoothie :)


Yummy Mayo Chicken

This chicken recipe (or variations on the theme) is getting a fair amount of press recently; oddly enough, while I was actually making this meal, a radio ad for Hellman's mayonnaise came on suggesting the recipe!
I find it is a tasty solution when you have a bag of chicken breasts, a hungry family, and zero inspiration.

3 llbs chicken breast
1 cup mayonnaise (not low fat)
1/2 cup grated Parmesan cheese
Italian bread crumbs
seasoned salt

1. Cover a large rimmed cookie sheet with foil and spray with Pam
2. Lay out chicken breasts and sprinkle with seasoned salt
3. Combine the mayo and Parmesan cheese in a bowl and then coat the chicken with the mixture. Use it all up and really blanket them!
4. Sprinkle Italian bread crumbs over the top
5. Bake for about 20 minutes in a 425 degree oven.

Obviously I am not a food photographer, but it tastes better than it looks!


Easy Rule #45123: Look into daycare. It's obviously a full service operation.

Easy Rule #22155: Theo just told me that this post is just a mini-rant that happens to include recipes. Josephine said the rule should be, "Eating is good." I hope you learned something here today.

A Week in Review

Ems here:

This week, post Easter, has been so so busy! We had Ohio state testing for the older boys on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday--reading, math, and science, respectively.  They survived it, just a bit burnt out from all the writing involved. It's no joke nowadays, you even have to explain your answers in math. Boo, just boo. We had to run out the morning of the math test and buy protractors because ours disappeared; irony is that the boys said no questions required a protractor. Sure glad I stressed out about it.  Theo told a funny story about how one boy stood up before the test, twirling his protractor, and proclaiming, "I don't even know how to use this thing!" I'm glad his mother wasn't around to hear. I can only imagine the embarrassing things my children say when I'm absent....

Here are some other happenings this week:

1. Simona and I switched faces, courtesy of Aunt Bets and a wickedly funny app:

Who needs self-esteem anyway? Get this App!

2. My angel Gabriel (nearly 3) has been cracking me up lately. He has taken to complimenting me randomly throughout the day. Here's a classic example:

"Mom, you so pretty. You so nice. You so not a weirdo."  

Um thanks...I guess...


I heard Simi screaming in the other room and walked in to see Gabe forcefully hugging her, obviously against her will. "Gabe! Get off Simona! She doesn't want you to hug her!," I shout over the drama. To which he calmly declares, "It's true love."  Interesting interpretation there, pal.

3. Unattended baby discovers the joy of doughnuts. Because there weren't enough sweets in the house after Easter.

4. My friend Cassie and I have a mom and daughter play date, with cookies and cocoa. Guess which cookies I did NOT make... It was such a nice time!

5. The weekend was completely soccer filled! Weather was great, kids won their games, good times!

The perfect picture. Matt and Theo ready to juke defenders and score.....and if you look carefully, Coach Dad in the background!

6. While the older boys were in testing at the Hampton Inn, the little kids and I hung out behind the test site. You'd never guess we were 10 feet away from the Inn, would you? Sim was a little tired waiting for the boys to be done. I was a lot tired.

Off to sleep, courtesy of Nyquil, as I am currently in the throes of a nasty cold that is sneezing itself through the family. Please pray that it burns itself out quickly as I despise a stuffy nose.


Easy Rule #5221: The only thing worse is when the baby has a stuffy nose. Ah, I hear her now.

Soccer Time

Ems here--

While Jules' life is filled with parties (whoo-hoo!), mine has started to be filled with SOCCER! As most parents of school age kids know, kids' sports and activities can quickly take over one's life. In my case, it's not that we have that many activities, it's that we have that many kids.  Having the children close in age, however, is a real blessing since the kids can be consolidated on fewer teams.  So basically, if you want to simplify life later, forget about baby spacing now!

Nate, at 11, is on a U12 travel team. It is truly a great experience for him, and we are blessed to be part of such a good group of coaches and kids. Nate looks forward to every practice (and there are three of 'em a week) and views his whole team as his friends. Yes, we are very blessed in that regard! Being a part of a team is an important life lesson--learning to trust your teammates, while stepping up so as not to disappoint them; celebrating and mourning as a unit. I've seen him thrive over the past season.  It's been great to see him being one of the younger ones on the team too....it takes the edge off the "older child Boss" syndrome he's got going on at home.

Theo and Matt are on the U10 travel team, with daddy as the head coach.  They love having each other as teammates, and I gotta say, it's a cool thing to watch a sweet give-and-go ending in a goal by my little guys.  I feel like they've gotten closer over the past year, and a large part is their team unity.

My 45 pound gazelle. Or perhaps a leaping faun. Either way, he's a tricky little chap!

Because the boys truly love soccer, as does my husband, soccer season is very exciting for the whole family. I try to make every game, unless the weather is too horrible for the baby, and it makes for busy, wonderful Sunday afternoons outside. This past game, I brought along a loaf of bread and peanut butter, granola bars, and water, and the little kids had a rollicking good time chasing each other on the sidelines.  There are definitely worse places to spend a couple hours!

So obviously, some activities can be beneficial not just to the children, but to the family. Other activities, eh, not so much. I have had Jo enrolled in gymnastics for the past year, but just recently pulled her out. The teachers weren't particularly nurturing or supportive--I've heard one declare on multiple occasions to a slow child, "My grandma can run faster than that!"  Niiiiice.  Jo was recently moved up a group since she was no longer a beginner, but the new bunch of girls are too old for her....she's 6 and there are some 10-12 year olds in the group.  I feel like the teacher expected too much from her, both in skill and behavior.  Jo never practiced at home, and although she always told me she liked gymnastics, I just didn't see enough good emerge from the experience.

Although I do want her to be involved in something, I think I need to relax and remember that she is just 6. There will be time for her to find her interest and a positive environment in which to foster it.  I certainly know that soccer is OUT! She has made it quite clear that she is not following in her brothers' footsteps anytime soon...despite the temptation of pink cleats.....

It seems that weighing whether or not an activity is worthwhile comes down to a few factors:

1. How much does the child enjoy the sport/activity?
2. Is the environment (team, coaches, etc.) a positive one?
3. Do you have help with transportation and/or other commitments?
4. Is it worth the money?

Perhaps we have gotten a bit activity "mad" when it comes to our children....we just want them to have tons of awesome experiences! Maybe being a choosey mom is beneficial to the whole family's well-being.


Easy Rule #3466: Nothing is better than watching your children thrive in an activity they love.
Easy Rule #10335: A 12 passenger van makes for a Carpool Central.

One Car Life Lessons

Ems here:

Two months ago when the lease on our Honda minivan terminated, we decided to take the plunge...NOT to choose a sparkly new vehicle from the lot despite tempting offers, and instead, survive solely with one (giant) van.  I admit, I was skeptical about this plan. Although the Scrooge-ish side of me understand the value of only having one monthly payment, the practical side of me was kinda freaking out--activities, shopping, appointments--how was this going to work out??

Where all the magic happens.

So here are some things I've learned with this new experience of Solo Vehicle Living:

1. Planning, planning - Bri's work schedule is up on the calendar and I really look at it because it really matters. What days is he home early? What days is he off? With that information, I can schedule appointments, plan grocery store trips, initiate play dates, etc. Essentially, spontaneity is out the window, but it doesn't mean that all activity stops...we just have to color within the lines a bit more.

2. Team Family - We need to work together as a family. If I'm out of milk and Bri is on a work stretch, he will have to grab it on the way home even though he's super tired since I won't be able to leave the house the next day. On other days, it's either we all go someplace together or someone stays home--there is no going in opposite directions! It creates a One For All, All For One mentality..and we go more places together, even if it's just to WalMart.

3. Humility - I HATE asking for help. Like, it's a serious pride issue.  The boys are very involved in soccer, but there are just some practices to which we just cannot get them, and I've had to call on other parents to transport my kids. People are so kind. They truly don't mind, I can tell. We reciprocate when we can, but mostly I just have to be humble and say "Thank you. I really appreciate it." Because I really do.

4. Savings - We needed the financial breathing room (I mean, who doesn't?), and it has been so helpful to have more money each month, plain and simple. Check out the new couch we finally got! We were able to ditch the 12 year old ripped one at last.

*Pillows are subject to change

5. Bunkering In - You know that feeling you get when a big blizzard comes and you can't leave the house but you have milk, eggs, and electricity so it's ok? That's the same feeling I get when Bri leaves for work and I am in the house with no escape. It's almost freeing in some weird way. I feel like I have no other choice than to clean house and get things organized and take care of the kids....not that I do anything different any other day necessarily, but having choice taken from you sometimes allows you to act without hesitation. Like when the teacher provides you with a specific essay prompt--there's no dithering with the decision of 'which should I choose?', you just have to make do and run with it. This is me running with it. And the introvert inside is a happy girl. Except on phone free Fridays. Lent is rough.

You get me through many a long day, my little phone.

I'm not sure how long we will be a one car family. I don't know that I would recommend others dropping a vehicle if it wasn't necessary. But I do know that like everything in life, there is a silver lining to sacrifice. Wait, that's my Easy Rule.

Easy Rule #3114: There's a silver lining to every sacrifice.

Spelling Bee and Other Trials

Ems here:

Such a busy couple weeks! Firstly, Theo (age 10) was able to compete in the Regional Spelling Bee on Saturday, although he was technically the alternate--shout out to John Paul, the local winner (unable to compete because the Scripps bee requires participants to be in the 5th grade)!  We had a couple months to prepare for the Bee utilizing a list of words provided....14 pages of insanely challenging words from various countries.

It's so funny "studying" with a lazy smart kid. Basically we did 15 minutes of word study a day and then he would casually exit the room while I was distracted by, you know, a baby or a 2 year old or a phone call. Or I would remind him to look over the words only to find him 4 minutes later reading a book with the list strewn over the back of the couch.  However, with a few days to go till the Bee, he suddenly got a case of the What the Bleep Am I Doing internal freak-out: headaches, insomnia, random bouts of late-night word list review. It would have been hilarious if I weren't so concerned.

As my youngest sister, Bets, pointed out wisely, "It's all part of growing up." She's right. I remember being a ball of stress before (and during) piano recitals; I remember being on stage during the mandatory school plays and wanting to crawl into a hole; I remember trying out for All State Choir realizing MUCH too late that my voice was only so-so compared to the other talent out there.  I know that these experiences shape us, mold us, change us and ultimately help make us the people we are today. It doesn't make it any easier watching a child go through it.

Bri and I gave him daily pep talks of the variety:

"It will be fine! You've studied, you're smart, just do your best!"
"Well, if you were this worried, you should have been studying more all along!"
"Just relax and you will do alright."
"Try not to be the first one out, mmm'kay?"

When the big day came, we piled into the van and headed downstate 20 miles. The adventure was magnified by the fact that we decided to keep driving post-Bee and visit Bri's parents who live 4 hours from our house, in the same direction.  As such, our morning was full of laundry and packing and last minute word studying.

We walked into the large elementary school building and after signing in, Theo was immediately whisked away to join the other participants..no time for last minute advice or hugs--tear :(

After a long and very tedious hour of waiting, Theo and the other 48 children made their way across the stage. He looked so little! But I was so proud that when it was his turn to answer the first practice round question and give his name, grade, and (virtual) school, he did so very calmly and collectedly. No fainting or crying or whispering. I felt like he had already won some small battle.

Theo is the little one behind the microphone. In the front row, of course. I was PRAYING he wouldn't do something embarrassing. The worst was a case of excessive lounging due to obvious boredom. Homeschool kids aren't used to sitting still that long....I clearly need to lecture more.

Finally, the real Bee began:

Quesadilla! Contiguous! Transect! Sayonara! Infinitesimal! Lieutenant! Pennant! Mascot! Verboten! Maraca! Paddock! Incorruptible! Discipline!

The kids were dropping like flies. Theo made it till Round 3, put out by the word "Kabuki." Oh well. That's the luck of the draw in a spelling bee. The girl after him got "toucan" much to Theo's jealous dismay.

All in all, Theo placed 12th and received a $25 Visa gift card, as did all the participants.  Top 10 got trophies, and the winner is headed to the Big Bee in D.C.

When I asked him afterwards if he would shoot for the Regional Bee again, knowing all that was involved--the studying, the stress, etc.--he looked at me like I had two heads, "Of COURSE I will try to get here again! You get $25 bucks just for showing up!!"

So, all my fears allayed for the bargain price of $25 bucks. I will remember this.

Well, off to deal with the latest round of diarrhea and vomiting due to the LLSFERBM virus (Longest Lasting Stomach Flu Ever Recorded By Man).

Sayonara! Go eat a quesadilla and discipline your kids! And having an infinitesimal amount of sugar is surely not verboten, even during Lent. Perhaps you can catch some Kabuki theater on NetFlix.


Easy Rule #3867: The kids are alright. Breathe. Experience. And then protect them more till next time.

Winner Winner Pancake Dinner and Other Yummy Stuff

Ems here:

Milestone reached: my children made dinner tonight! Nate, with sous chef Theo, requested they make pancakes, scrambled eggs, sausage, and orange julius (I helped with the beverage).  They did a fabulous job! So any of you moms out there in the trenches with just little tiny people, take hope! Someday your kids, too, will make dinner whilst you (sorta, kinda, maybe) relax.

And following on the heels of Jules' soup post, I thought I would share a newly discovered soup favorite too! Everyone in my family loves it (no small thing) and it is super affordable and healthful (double yay). I got the original recipe from All Recipes.

But here's how it all starts:

1. Buy yourself a nice whole chicken (I usually get a 5-6 pounder). Now you have a choice on cooking it--either find a good crockpot chicken recipe, or oven roast it. I prefer the taste of an oven-baked chicken personally.

2. Serve your family a great chicken dinner--but make sure they save all their bones! When all the children are tucked into their beds, scrape the pan you cooked the chicken in and put ALL the leftover chicken parts into the crockpot. (If you have lots of meat left on the chicken, remove it first for sandwiches!).

3. Into the crockpot, throw in a halved onion, some carrot, some celery (if you have any). Then fill the whole crockpot to the near-top with water. Season with whatever you like your stock to taste like--salt, pepper, celery seed, bay leaf, etc.

4. Put on low overnight. In the morning, you've got yourself a beautiful chicken stock, and base for the soup you will make tonight!

Now, time to get your Wedding Soup* on! All you need are the following ingredients:

1 lb ground beef
1 package thawed spinach
carrots
small noodles (mini shells or small elbows work well)
Parmesan cheese

1. Make your meatballs. This takes the longest time because they have to be cute-sized (3/4 inch). Mix the ground beef with 2 eggs, breadcrumbs, 2 T Parm cheese, 1 tsp dried basil, 2 tsp onion powder.

2. Chop some carrots into rounds.

3. Thinly slice spinach.

4. Strain your chicken stock and bring it to a boil. Season it liberally to taste--it always needs more salt!

5. Add in meatballs, carrots, spinach, and noodles (however many you like, usually 1-2 cups). Cook at a slow boil for 10 minutes.

6. Serve with Parmesan cheese on top and of course, with homemade bread!

*Recipe adapted from Mama's Italian Wedding Soup submitted by Lalena on All Recipes.com.


Here's a picture, but it's not that great of one. It's taken the next day, and noodles have puffed up to obscene proportions. But you can get the idea. DELICIOUS!

Easy Rule #1098: Winter + Soup= Comfort

Easy Rule #1294: Allow your kids some kitchen freedom. They may be future chefs! Or at least will be able to make more than Ramen noodles.

Mini-Rant #1

Jules here-

After surviving my road-trip, I am finally reveling in time with my sister-- watching our favorite shows, eating fantastic food, and playing numerous word games.  Of course, our bonding is incessantly punctuated by the demands of TEN children needing frivolous things such as food and water. Still, we tolerate the noise, mess, and chaos of the children frolicking because we adore seeing their love, joy and enthusiasm for each other.

Which brings me to my rant. So many people say to me after hearing of Em's brood, "Oh- I could never handle that many children" or I often get, "I could never homeschool my children- they would never listen to me..." etc. etc. etc.   In the discipline of my children, I often say that I expect a lot of them-- and they usually meet my expectations. The SAME concept should apply to adults-- stop expecting so little of yourself?  Of course if someone gave you seven kids one day and said, "Handle it," it would turn into spectacular reality TV.  BUT-- if you, like Ems, had children the way nature intended-- you could handle it.  Would life be easy, relaxing, and stress-free? Um... no, but blessings are great!

Think back to other never statements you have made--- "I could never handle a child with special needs." Would you want to have a child with special needs?-- of course you would hope for "normal,"but how do you know you couldn't handle it? You don't.  People make life-altering and life-ending decisions based on their own fears and self-assumed inadequacies.  Working in healthcare, I have always had a problem with Living Wills-- though the concept sounds fantastic.  I mean, how do you know what you'll want 10, 15, 20 years in the future?  For example, I have had peers say, "I would never want a feeding tube, if I couldn't eat, I would want to just die."

Well, I have had a couple of patients that had strokes that could walk and (sort-of) talk,but they had a swallowing dysfunction-- so their family debated (actually DEBATED) not feeding the patient as that's what they wished for 20 years before..... Seriously. The person could smile, laugh, walk, etc.....  Would you want to die if you could still hold your kids, read books, and at least sit at the dinner table? I wouldn't.  As for life and death decisions, have a family member you trust as your legal spokesperson in the hospital, don't leave it up to a piece of paper that can't possibly encompass ALL of the possible scenarios in the future. 

We tell our children to "never give up" and "you can do anything" meanwhile, we turn to our friends and murmur, "I could never take all the kids to the grocery store myself" or "I would never want to live in a wheelchair."  My advice would be: You NEVER know how you'd handle something in the future.  Wouldn't you rather think the best of yourself? Maybe you could be like this guy who turned tragedy into triumph:

So instead of rationalizing your fears of "having another child" or trying to anticipate how you'll react to something in the future- be more assured of yourself, stop selling yourself short, and embrace the unexpected.  Challenges can transform you into someone you truly could be proud of.

You could totally handle it.

Easy Rule #7321 Don't plan too much in the future- you'll be a different person then.
Easy Rule #7422 Ten kids together is crazy fun-- with the emphasis on crazy.