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Thursday, May 22, 2014

You might be inadvertently raising a dumb jock if....

Jules here-

After three years of raising girls, I was blessed with a big (9 pound) baby boy in 2011.  Though excited about the prospect of raising a boy, I had no real experience with the differences with the genders.  As the third child, he was lucky to have "boy" hand-me-down clothes, but he also was exposed to tutus, pink blankets, and lots of princess stuff.

Tinkerbell James... he will kill me some day for posting this....
Somehow, through all of his girly exposures, he has surpassed my husband's prayers and is a tad obsessed with sports. So my top ten this week will highlight the ridiculousness of having a 2 1/2 year old who exhibits early signs of being athletics-obsessed.

So, you might be inadvertently raising a dumb jock if....

10.  Your son's first word is "ball".  After the classic, "Dada", James instantly attached himself to any ball: tennis, baseball, basketball, etc.  He called all balloons balls too and often pretended they were different sports balls by kicking them, hitting them with a bat, etc...


9. Your son's only words are sports-related.  I often joke with strangers who comment on my son's proclivity to sports  that my son knew how to say "hockey puck" before milk. I'm actually not joking.  I would ask him repeatedly to say, "Please, milk, mommy," or "More please!" Instead, he could only utter sports phrases like a neanderthal ESPN anchor.



8. Your son helps with the laundry only for the dryer balls.  I have discovered James in my dryer countless times trying to access the amazing dryer balls.  After he gets them out, he likes to peg them back into the dryer as if playing dodge ball with my clean sheets.


7.  Your son travels everywhere with a ball.  James carries golf balls with him for car rides, museum trips, boat rides, etc.  He knows the rule that if he drops it, mom's got it, and if he throws it, he loses it for good.  He carries it around and NEVER loses it.  We traveled to an island in the Boston Harbor last week and he toted it for 7 hours, only putting it down to eat.

Here's where we were-- highly recommended day trip to George's Island!
6. Your son may want to move into a neighbor's house who has more sports equipment. My neighbors (who we are having the fantastic cooking contest with) are a bit hockey-obsessed with air hockey table in the basement, two kid's hockey nets in their living room, and a full-sized one in their driveway.  Unlike most shy, mommy-centered two-year olds, James repeatedly asks to visit them and plays non-stop when we go there...


5. Your son only checks out non-fiction sports books from the library.  James knows exactly where the "real sports" books are. We have read the history of basketball, techniques for golfing, and the encyclopedia of football.  Want to learn more about the perfect baseball swing? I don't.

I've read this book countless times. It's as boring as it looks.
4. Your son enjoys watching golf on TV.  Besides my brother-in-law, I really don't know anyone who likes to watch golf on television, except my 2 year old at 6 AM.  He begs to watch the golf channel and routinely cheers for the ball to "Get in the hole!!"  My son was named after my late grandfather, James William, who adored golfing. Now, I am not saying I believe in reincarnation, but it's a little uncanny how much my son LOVES golf...
Leaning forward, actually thrilled at golf...

3. Your son has a better golf swing than you.  I am an avid mini-golfer, but I have never played 'real' golf before--yet my son can hit the ball much better than I can.  He loves to putt and drive the ball throughout my house (the "real" golf balls are only allowed outside....).




2. Your son is pickier about his clothing than his sisters.  Yes, my girls love to dress up for church and wear their favorite clothes, but they never argue when I lay out an outfit.  I have never had a struggle to get them in clothes--- until James.  He only wants to wear shirts with sporting equipment on it. He threw a 10 minute fit over a guitar shirt screaming, "Me not rock n' roll guy-- me sports guy!" I eventually won; he was a begrudging rock n' roll guy for a day (but normally he looks like this)....


1.  No matter where you are, your son will find sports anywhere. We were blessed with a Florida time share vacation in the winter with my in-laws; sun, sand, and pools, but the whole time, James wanted to play on the putting green.  Luckily, I could sit near by and read while he putted....constantly....




Am I concerned that my son would rather throw or hit a ball than play with pretty much anything else? Nah. This could be a stage, or he'll need to train so he can go pro in whatever sport he finally ends up playing (because at this rate it doesn't look like he'll be getting any academic scholarships....). Someday I hope he wants to learn letters and numbers, but for now, we are on high alert for flying sports equipment at my house.

And yes, I have countless videos like this:




But don't worry there's still enough "girl" influence....




Easy Rule #897978- There are gender differences, no matter what new-age scientists are trying to tell you.

Easy Rule #89079-  You have to learn to have fast-reflexes in my house- DUCK!!

7 comments:

  1. James can come over and play hockey whenever he wants.

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    1. I think he already does come over pretty much whenever he wants... you probably want to rescind the "open neighbor" policy :)

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  2. James has a great golf follow through, but if his athletic career doesn't take off...perhaps his singing career will.

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    1. Well, his singing career will be a tad better than Austin's I think. Austin will just have to go pro in hockey.

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    2. I hope so, that means free tickets. Next time James is over I'll introduce him to my electric guitar. :)

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  3. the only thing better is living in "Golf-town"!!! :)

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    1. I should have put that one on too! SO FUNNY!!!

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